Sunday, December 10, 2006

Learning it all the hard way

Still have 3 more important parts to go in project, and I haven't started Appendix. Gosh.

What a bad example of a good student.

I was once modelled as a good student, by a lot of lecturers, but I'm really dissapointed at myself being this STUPID, stupid coz I didn't manage my time well for it previously. I could have done much better, if I started at least in June, things would be much more easier. I would have just to glance through the project a few times now to check for errrors. But no I didn't, instead I gave myself stupid excuses not to do it, going out with my ex gf during June to September and thinking that it wouldn't matter as I would still have time. Oh how wrong could I be, what a silly boy...wasting time like nobody's business and now 4 days before due date I have like tons to go, and even if I completed them, it would be of low quality. Sigh, really dissapointed.

I was too overconfident, even took note of a senior of mine who said she did it in one month (she's comp science student dammit why didn't I used my brains! Programmers can finish an application much faster then we noobs in BIS). I so so regret of the many mistakes I did during doing this project. Like spending free time in Intel not touching the documentation but being so focus at my work and my work only, and once I left there, everyone forgets me and I'm left with square one....where to look at next? my dumb final year project which I left there like ages. Stupidity...

The application alone, if I were to ask someone (really finding seniors by really contacting them and talk about it) wouldn't I have so much confidence I'm able to deliver a good piece of prototype application months before the due date? Why why did I first think I could complete the coding all by myself, and actually spending 2 months thinking which programming language is better. What was I thinking? There is no way I can complete it by myself... I didn't expect that, I thought I could do it, but I was very very very wrong. I couldn't. It was not like doing some assignment with a one week and you still can finish it. It is not. It is a huge huge project, like its name refers it to. I was dumb, stupid, lack of time management, over expecting myself, wasting time, didn't seriously look into my project earlier, simply believing what people have said, didn't look for help earlier, and lastly, not touching much of my documentation coz I thought that coding comes first. Ya in any godlike way am I gonna finish it.

Dumb. Stupid. Arrogant. Overconfident. Lazy.

I could only use those words to describe myself. And I learnt it all the hard way.

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