she decide to call it off, the whole thing.
ask me to walk my way and stop contacting her, that there is no more chance for us.
sad...
well have to face the fact and walk a new beginning.
"Dear Lord, I don't know what's gonna happen in future, when everything seems so vague. That there is no clear picture for me to look forward to.
Sometimes I don't know what's real anymore. It's like I got hit by a car and couldn't understand why it hit me.
I just ask for the grace that I will continue to do your will, and not give up with life. Even if the toughest challenges were to happen I am happy that you are always there with me.
You are the person I trust most, through thick and thin you have been with me, and to you this incident is so tiny it is insignificant, and that I should not lose heart because of it.
Yes Lord, plenty of fishes in the seas, as men said, and you've already determined who is the person I'm to spend my life with, thus I do not need to worry bout it. To let you handle such a matter and to make best use of my life is what you will for me.
You've always taught me to be strong, to continue living the faith, and to be a good person. Yet sometimes I failed and my focus went elsewhere due to the loneliness that is creeping in, the stress in the world, and the human weaknesses of mine. I ask for pardon and strength to continue this journey.
Spending eternal life with you, dear God, which is where my ultimate focus should be. Rather than trivial matters on earth that I should stop bothering so much about. As you've said in the Word that life on earth is just a drop of water compared to eternal life which is the Ocean.
Help me be free of bondage, of things that are clinging deep in my heart now, so that I can start anew, to turn over a new leaf.
Help me to go more often to church, and to CG, as I'm losing sight of you more and more due to not attending so often as I did in the past.
Thank you Jesus, thank you God.
Amen."
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